Originally Posted by doubtfulguest
you have no idea how touched i am, Deacongirl.

right now, my kid's primary survival tactic is to blend in, but i worry that if she's always shaping herself around others, she'll never have a friend who truly knows her. it gives me a lot of hope to think that there might be kids like yours out there who might really enjoy her for who she is. thank you!

Well, I have to encourage you then. My dd was lucky enough to have a few friends (one in particular) who really got her when she was younger...but she has gotten very good now at picking girls who appreciate having enthusiastic conversations about feminism and justice and literature etc. etc. I wish I could have recorded the conversation in the car after I picked up her and her friend from The Great Gatsby. But even in a middle school with a lot of affluence and conspicuous consumption (and in a conservative county in a conservative state) she has managed to find kindred spirits and she is comfortable showing who she really is. She is leaps ahead of me at that age. I think just the fact that you are aware that this could be an issue for your dd is a huge step. She sounds like a very cool kid!