alli-cat10,

I remember feeling stung when dd (then 4)'s pre-k teacher told us at the parent/teacher conference that she was worried about dd's sociability because she didn't greet the other kids when she entered the classroom in the morning. She just went directly to a certain area of the room and started playing by herself.

But after a couple of weeks of worry -- and prodding dd with questions about whether she played with the other children -- I just let it be. I decided, why shouldn't she be allowed to do what she wants with her own "free choice" time?

That being said, I also knew that dd did have friends in the class (because she had been at the same school for awhile and I had previously had the chance to observe when volunteering and at birthday parties, etc).

Perhaps you could email the teacher back -- tell her you appreciate her looking out for dd -- but that she does take some time to warm up. You might ask her for suggestions of children in the class who may have similar interests as your dd and then set up an outside play date. I really think at this age, familiarity breeds friendship. Plus, one on one can be a lot easier for some kids than the madness of the playground.

And on the plus side, at least you have a teacher who is paying attention to the kids. smile