I have a son that started Suzuki piano at age 5. He just turned 10 and has been taking 4 1/2 years. Music at the moment is mandatory and considered curriculum for my kids (we homeschool). My 6 year old daughter started Suzuki violin at 4.
For both of them, we find a piece of it they love. My son loves "showing off". He likes performing or preparing for events, so the more his teacher can do this, the better. He also love playing FAST. He's working through a bunch of more modern music right now.
On the sight reading piece, we are still with a Suzuki teacher. But at my son's age and level, he could easily move to a traditional teacher now. He reads all his Suzuki music to learn it. We started by just doing a couple minutes of sight reading a day, and worked up from there until he got to the point where he needs the music. My kids probably works 2/3rds the time outside Suzuki repertoire at this point. Maybe you could ease into the sight reading instead of an all or nothing approach if he does enjoy playing by ear more.
Our practice time is "play" time. We joke and fool around and when we're out of time, we're done. Even though my son is excellent and competitive (someone called him a prodigy to his face last week!
definitely NOT true), we don't get too intense about it at home. Most of the kids he plays with are so much more serious and competitive than he is. But his teacher works well with his personality. We've had 3 different piano teachers and I think personality fit is huge! If the teacher is throwing too much at your child, I'd definitely talk to the teacher about backing WAY down and going back to just making it fun. How about different styles, improv, composition, theory?
Anyway - good luck with your decisions! Don't be afraid to take a break and switch it up if it isn't working for you right now. My kid does not like to practice every day, but has never actually asked to quit. You know your child best - does he hate every piece of piano, or is just getting to the piano daily the hard part? Having a regular practice time is huge at this house.
