Yes, I should have explained better:
we HAVE taken steps to stabilize the situation, absolutely. New passwords on all of the other (non-DD) computers, disabling the LAN at night, and physically REMOVING her laptop into our bedroom each night. We have also taken the stance that if she wipes the history or cache files, she WILL lose computer privileges, even if that has a deleterious impact on her grades of social life; and that we will be checking her account activity and internet use regularly.
So we are hopeful that this will rapidly turn things around. That and the whopping VitD deficiency that the bloodwork revealed, that is.
I think maybe this was just surprise that I asked/mentioned things on the part of the intake PA, and, as you noted, that this is not the "usual" thing. After a little bit of back and forth with the Psych2 (the doctor, that is), the PA seemed much less stand-offish over the "preliminary" appointment with DH and me. We now have an appointment about a week ahead of the scheduled appointment with DD.
I made it clear that we view this appointment as a way for the three of us to candidly share what we are hoping to learn and how she plans to investigate different possibilities. The PA responded with "of course, of course-- absolutely." (Which was, if not a completely different set of lyrics, at least a major key change from previous conversations with her. Oh well.)
We are definitely going into it with open minds. And since it is still about a month away, we have some definite hope that the situation should have radically changed for the better by then. It will have, if past history is anything to go by, anyway. DD always turns around about this time each spring.
As for the 'relax' line, well, you're right that nobody would actually SAY that to her... more that she'd put things together that way inside her head, I think.
Now, I don't know what we would tell her in that case; No Habla isn't going to work with this particular child, that is for sure. She's very savvy medically and we've never hidden test results from her, since we've always treated her like a partner in her healthcare.
More stuff to mention to the psychologist, I suspect.
