HowlerKarma, I think your daughter's long-lost twin resides at my house. It's very challenging - teasing out what's "normal" developmentally for them as an outlier, and what's potentially harmful.

I don't know where you are on the west coast, but are you familiar with the Eides? They have a particular interest in giftedness and quirks.

http://www.neurolearning.com/eides.htm