Originally Posted by Val
Worse is the fact that at least a couple people don't really seem to get (or care) that what they said is crass and belittling. Why would a person feel a need to belittle another? This is not something I get. As I said, people can (disingenuously IMO) claim that they're just being "honest" or engaging in free speech, but I think that other people may see through that. And I'm thinking that this attitude probably comes across in a general way if it's expressed so bluntly here.

So, yeah, a right to free speech includes a right to belittle other people's kids because they aren't as stupefyingly, electron-splittingly jelly-doughnut brilliant as your own little megabrained toddler and his IQ of ten to the power of six. We are all so small in comparison, I just hope my kids don't go blind from the sheer reflected magnificence of it all. We're just trying to muddle through as best we can, you know?

I guess I'm just voting that you want to belittle others, I'd prefer you do it somewhere else. PM each other. Call each other. Talk at the water cooler. Be as vicious as you please in private. Just don't give people like the woman who wrote that sick-of-hearing-about-your-gifted-kid-blog a valid reason to complain about parents of gifted kids. Please?

Your argument would come across better if you set aside all your negative assumptions about others. You are so concerned with how "vicious" everyone else is that you are blind to your own viciousness or belittling.

I'm interested in your thoughts, otherwise I wouldn't have commented. I liked that you brought up a different perspective. I wouldn't be arguing so strongly if I didn't think I had something to learn from you.

Personally, I wouldn't be offended if someone remarked that their child was remarkably beautiful. It's OK that DS isn't remarkable beautiful. It's OK that other parents have something to rally around. I'm happy for them. I don't find it offensive when other parents talk about the areas my DS is weak in. I don't find it offensive at all. Why would I? I'm not insecure.

Would they be displaying a lack of tact, sure. But that doesn't make someone mean or vicious. You can't see someone's heart by guessing at their intentions.

Why so defensive? Why so attacking?

It's a friendly discussion, no?