Status update: the flow of math homework stopped (it was Sunshine Math stuff from the Florida state system), and when we inquired were told to print the worksheets from the web, have DS5 do them on his own and submit a summary. After a couple of weeks of no reading/writing homework, that's started up again (edhelper.com worksheets). DS5.5 likes going to school as much as he does day care, and basically considers it to be a different daycare.
We have an upcoming TAT meeting toward the end of April. We met with the K teacher, who told us that based on such things as him having a meltdown over his zipper not working one day, and the fact that she observed him acting like an animal at playtime, she feels that he's "right where he needs to be", and she'd be recommending no skip.
I told her that while I understand her concerns, my main problem is that he's not being taught anything, as enrichment worksheets are not the same as lessons teaching concepts. I said that if the school were to actually start giving him lessons for the first time in material he doesn't already know, I'd be happier for him to be with his age-mates all the time. I also said that I'd be all right with him not being taught reading or writing, as he seemed to be picking that up fine on his own, but that I wanted him to actually be taught math and science for the first time, so we don't have to stumble through it on our own at home and so that 8 hours a day at school aren't wasted. I said I'd be happy with buying a math curriculum like Singapore Math and sending it with him to school, if they won't do pull-outs, but that someone would have to be available to teach him. (I think I probably came off as a bit snippy, even though I was guarding against it.)
After that, afraid that the school would rely on inertia and the K teacher's recommendation to give DS5 little or nothing that he needs for next year, we tested him. It turns out that he has DYS-qualifying scores despite extreme testing anxiety that led him to not answer many questions (I hope never to have to put him through those tests again). Now I'm wishing we'd done it earlier, since any advocacy from DYS won't come until after the TAT meeting.
