ah just deleted my very long post... will try again later. Long story short - I interact with several gifted kids, my DD has the highest IQ by quite a way, honestly you wouldn't know it most of the time. I think that conversations limiting giftedness are dangerous territory for people with such a huge emotional investment. I think it's easy to reject inclusiveness when your child makes an arbitrary grade instead of being the kid that is only in the top 3 or 5% who still have needs.
What is the purpose of your group, is it to socialise, advocate, commiserate? If so then the more the merrier surely? If however it is to provide stimulation for the top few percent then yes I guess you can be more exclusive. Some would argue that the top 2% are not highly gifted and that you would need a separate group for the top .1%.
I do think that it is odd to label a kid a specific LOG without evidence of some kind. I don't think that is limited to IQ tests though.
FWIW - I find it very difficult to keep my mouth shut about DD, one because I am an open book, people would think it weird if I didn't talk about her much. Second ( and I know this may change at some point) I don't think I should feel embarrassed to talk about her. She hasn't done anything wrong, I don't walk into a room and say wow look what we did today either....
