I started this post in a notepad file, and lost track of the originators of the quotes... this was dumb, but there you have it... anyway.... I also switched keyboard languages by mistake, and can`t figure out where, I`ve fixed it in two places and it`s still wrong. (this is where I admit I`ve had a glass or two)
(quoting)Currently reading reports before another IEP meeting for DS8, also AS. This time the speech therapist was able to clearly demonstrate that while he knows all the answers to what he is supposed to do in most social situations he just cannot apply that knowledge in real life.(/quoting)
This is me, in a nutshell... it's why I do so much better online. A chance to edit, even slightly, works wonders.
AS I've gotten older, it's gotten better, but the STRESS of making it happen is significant. I think that's something people, neurotypical and otherwise, need to hear, often, and loudly.
My older son is young enough that this reality is very noticable. He knows what he should do... but that doesn't mean he can do it. See my earlier comment about him tantrumming because he was afraid he wouldn't be able to act as he desired to.
(quoting) with my cognitive deprivation model of the naughty spot.(quoting)
When DSelder is really tantrumming, I cover his eyes in time out. This is a kind of manful thing that I feel very displeased with on an ethical level. I definitely do not do it if I think he`s melting down. But if he can SEE, he can escape the physical restriction of time-out (I hold him on my lap, he`s nowhere even close to being able to stay in a time-out by himself). Same deal as restricting reading, I think. His mind is wide enough to serve him for a playground, as it were, so long as he can see.(équoting)
(quoting)With all three of my kids, though, I've found that dealing with them without manipulation has worked the best. Straightforward explanations about why they cannot do something, firm lines where it really mattered, and a willingness to negotiate everything else is what helped me maintain sanity.(équoting)
I sometimes feel bad that I don`t use all the sweet little tricks other parents use with their kids... giving a substitute toy for something you`re taking away, and so on. But then something happens, and I recall just how badly my kids seem to react to those tricks. They`re so kind and gentle, when they work, but when the kid sees through them they suddenly look cruel.
(quoting)Some of it is personality. I'm really liking the person that my daughter is growing up to be, so there is a lot of hope for parents of younger kids. She was an enormous amount of work/stress/trouble for about seven years, but it's paying off handsomely now.(équoting)
In my somewhat drunken state, I feel a deep need to reply to this statement with `I love you,` and `Please say that one more timeÉ`
Now that I`ve replied to all the stuff that got posted while I was writing my previous post...
MumofThree: where we live, DS starts K next Sept, so it`s not far off. Nearly all kids have preschool going in, as well. You may still have a point, though, it`s just that we`re running low on time. I have to make a decision about how I`m going to approach the change. What I`m going to tell him about school, and what I`m going to expect from him in terms of how he is at school. Given his reactions to Preschool, we might need a LOT of mental health days.
thanks for the thread folks... these things make my life much better.
-Mich
