Perhaps a little stats illustrates my point better than the verbiage in my earlier post. If my children hypothetically require my 24/7 attention for x years... which has large repercussions for my career, our family finances, and how DH and I parent.
I think a lot depends on how comfortable you feel changing your thinking from "my child
requires my 24/7 attention" to my child "would like, demands, would benefit from, my full time attention," Our oldest would probably have loved to be an only child- she is PG and was VERY high intensity-fun and amazing and exhausting... and of course, she also didn't sleep well (luckily, 2 of our 4 did sleep well, including our best sleeper, #3, without which we might have stopped at that point!). All were co-sleepers and extensively nursed, but at some point, if you have more children, your child will adjust to the fact that they can't have you 24/7. I'll be honest, some of the kids DO get more attention due to their personality, which is probably unfair to the others, but hey, life is unfair. We try our best. Not to scare you off more kids forever, but my two intense ones definitely required a lot more ER/urgent care visits over the years (intense ones sometimes do crazy things, even with lots of supervision!!). But your children WILL adjust if you have more kids. And maybe this is stupid or naive to say, but I think my kids are good friends because we have made that a huge priority - being kind, developing joint interests, working and playing together, trying not to compare or cause resentment, etc... I think parents have a LOT to do with whether their kids become friends (and good citizens in general, although again, it took more work on all fronts for my most intense one). Did we give up things? Of course-and it definitely affected our finances and my career. I completely respect anyone who chooses not to give that up, but for me, honestly, my kids were more fun than any coworkers I can imagine, precisely because they were so smart and just great to be with.
