Originally Posted by sydness
Oh No! My little one, just turned 6 has been fine in school. ... I went to her open house the other day ...
I did not expect her to be the ONLY kid at her level.
...
She has been so happy so far with school - i couldn't imagine a better fit. .
I knew that she could 'snow' the teachers because she 'snowed' her sweet mama. And you are obviously a sensitive and observant momma.

It's just that gifted kids have nothing to do all day except whatever they set their mind to, which very often is putting one over on their momma. We have to cook and clean and sometimes work outside the home and be a marriage partner and try to stay true to ourselves and parent. It is no secrete to your younger that you were too exhausted to accomplish much for older daughter - just as it's clear to her on a psychic level - that something has changed for you - now you have our support AND now you are more successful in fighting for older DD. So she is showing that part of her that she had previously decided to keep buried - the impatient and frustrated part.

Even though it seems like teachers 'get' her - that actually are 'getting' the version of her that she wants to project. Heck, she has seen older sister be 'the smart one' and knows what the downsides of not fitting in are or being what other people want your to be. But with the changes in you, she is able to trust the world enough to cut out all that extra emotional work, and just be who she is. Wait and see - the teachers won't like her nearly so much now that she is more authentic. ((shrugs)) That's just how life is, right? As she grows up, just like the rest of us, she'll be better able to be flexible about how much of her authentic self to share and when to show something else instead. But that takes lots and lots of practice.

Even if younger DD isn't interested in reading,writing or Math, she still has a gifted brain in her head (most likely very similar to her sister) and it is doing something up there - even if we never see it! It is usual for us adults to narrowly define smarts as 'academic smarts.'

So please don't wait until the end of the week to contact the teacher. Just a mild email like this:
"Um....I'm hearing some stories from my DD about school that seem unusual for her. What do you think is going on?"

And then there is the theory that all kids hold back and try to be flexible until their capacity is exceeded and then 'snap' they flip into just demanding what they want - but since all kids differ on what their actual learning needs are and how much capacity they have, the 'snap' happens at different ages.

Sounds to me like like your younger daughter just reached her breaking point.

Smiles,
Grinity


Coaching available, at SchoolSuccessSolutions.com