Where is the limit, when do you know you have reached it. Even though we try and not pressure our kids, not praise the achievement but the effort, they know. I mean we are here becaue they are not stupid. So when do they know it is OK to relax, when it is hard, to say so? Maybe many of you know because you have seen that. With my three year old, she walks away, like with the scooter, until it got easier with size.
Ren
Oh Ren,
this is very well said! Yes they know which of their behaviors brings out the catch in our throats and the shine in our eyes - whatever that maybe. And when they get a little older, they tease us about it. Right now my DS11 is teasing us that he is our science project to see how much rock 'n roll trivia from 5 decades we can squeeze into one little brain. Still, he can almost tell Jethro Tull from Emerson, Lake and Palmer - and we are just so proud!
So I think that the advice to praise effort is a good way for us to focus our unconsious reactions, to become the parents our kids need us to be, and doesn't have to be an all or nothing thing.
Let me tell you, when your kid looks in your eyes and askes "Do you ever wish I was normal?" your heart will drop down to around your knees, and you will be glad for those unguarded moments when your body language just shows that yes! you love learning and you love that they love to learn!
Thanks for bringing that though back to the surface.
Grinity
