I've taken away everything a few times, the only thing I get is "I can't play Wii/toys/games/electronics/insert what we've taken away here". Very matter of fact, like he's waiting for us to say "nah, it's ok." And he'll say it over and over again. Both of us are very firm and consistent (both of us are prior military).

Thanks for the book recommendation, I'll see if they have that at our library.