Hi Ultra,
Yes, IMO teachers really have NO BUSINESS hinting around about ADD. They should fill out the diagnostic checklists that qualified evaluators ask of them, but they should not snidely tell anybody that their child "should be medicated" or anything of the sort. They are simply not equipped to make that kind of professional judgment; it is not in their training, and they should not take on that role.
I really do listen to teachers, because if they are telling me something is off, it invariably IS-- but the solution is not always what they think it is, and I really want my school team to listen to my private experts to learn about that, as well as deploying their own professional skills.
It may help to tell the hinty teacher in a serious tone, "We are working through these questions with our medical professionals." In a "this is the end of this conversation, thank you" kind of tone.
Long attention can indeed be related to ASD or ADD-- failure to transition from one thing to another. And it can be an asset, not just a liability. Very complex stuff.
Sorry about the school meltdown. I hope things get better soon.
DeeDee
