But the reason that it's a dilemma and not just a straightforward problem is that on the other hand are the arguements to just go with it, relax, let him mature, not to worry because he's smart he'll be fine. See? I guess quite a few parents of young kids have this same problem. The researched answer is, "gifted kids need authoratative parenting, not authoritarian, and not permissive." The mixed feelings come from the many facets that this advice could actually look like. Also, what about when it's the teacher? What about when it's the parent?

Youth lives by personality, age lives by calculation. -- Aristotle on a calendar