OMG - we *may* actually be making some progress...
I just got a call from new DSS. While we were away on vacation our consultant kept working on our behalf and has become convinced that new DSS is committed to trying to create a situation that will work for DD. I of course remained skeptical but after our conversation I am now a bit more optimistic.
She assured me there will be no color chart in DD's classroom "on Day 1". The principal's big concession in the process had been to allow for *2 weeks* without a color chart before she insisted on adding one so I made clear to new DSS that we would NEVER agree to DD being placed in a classroom that was designed to intentionally trigger her anxiety. I referred to it as "creating a hostile environment". When I pressed her on this she seemed to imply that no they would NOT be trying to add a color chart. I'm not sure I believe it but at least we know DD will be able to start the year this way. New DSS said that they will have to figure out how the teacher will manage the classroom instead. I gave her my mini lecture about thousands upon thousands of classrooms being effectively managed without color charts, how it is a discredited system and that all the better districts in the state have moved to positive behavior management systems like responsive classroom, PBIS etc. She said that she doesn't think she is in a position to convince the district of the need to change their philosophy about classroom management but I think at least it is now on the radar.
We had a long conversation about how this principal has single handedly turned this incredibly cooperative relationship into an intensely antagonistic, hostile one. I reviewed the pattern of her behavior - from the hat incident in February (discussed on another thread), to the IEP violation in March, to her being marginalized by the previous DSS and that her first act when he announced his departure was insisting that DD's classroom placement would include her biggest anxiety trigger.
I told her that we refrained from filing a complaint with the Dept of Education over the IEP violation because the former DSS intervened and effectively marginalized the principal. If the district is unable or unwilling to keep the principal marginalized now that former DSS is gone we will have no choice but to pursue complaints if the principal continues to antagonize DD. I said that I can not believe it is in the district's best interest to have a situation where they are constantly having to respond to complaints. She agreed but also said that she doesn't know if she is in a position to contain the principal herself. She would bring in the new director of pupil personnel services and asst superintendent if needed, though. I *think* she understands that this will be essential and that we have no choice but to do whatever we have to in order to protect DD if this principal continues to target her.
New DSS is absolutely crazy about the psych that we found. She wanted to know how we found someone so amazing. I explained that she is dealing with parents who do our research - we have a history of identifying issues long before the "experts" pick up on them and if we say that we have found the right professional you can take it to the bank. She was quiet but I assume was understanding that what I am reporting about the principal's behavior (and how she has managed to manipulate various people at central office about these various events) has more credibility than she would have liked to believe.
So like I said we *may* actually have made some progress. At least I know DD can go to school the first day without a color chart immediately triggering her anxiety. Also the principal's outrageous conduct should at least be on the district's radar. New DSS said during our conversation that the principal "made a decision that completely contradicted everything that had been agreed to previously" so I think she gets it. At least I hope she does...
Next week DD starts with the psych and has her neuropsych eval. I have been cherishing every moment with "happy summer DD" and am hoping against hope that we can keep her around once all the evaluations start. Even better if we can keep her around once school starts. It's hard to imagine that happening but I am holding onto my hope...
Will keep you posted.
