This will be a key piece of learning for DS. Have a look at Michelle Garcia Winner's Social Thinking curriculum.
http://socialthinking.com/ -- search by age for middle school materials
A school or private SLP could (should) be working on this with him.
Some school SLPs are trained to deal with articulation issues but not really social communication issues. In this regard, usually the fresher-out-of-school, the better.
ETA: p.s. In addition to direct instruction from the SLP, DS would benefit from having pushed-in services (could be SLP or Intervention Specialist) who would give him feedback on his interactions at various points in his day. This is needed in order to generalize the skills.
Looked at the Winner materials--is your suggestion that we do some of this (formal curriculum) at home, or that I find someone familiar with it to help, professionally?
There is a SLP program at the university here--they said they could work with DS on pragmatics, but at that time I was still waiting for the report. They didn't offer this information, but a teacher friend told me they will work on sliding scale (they don't accept insurance), so I may make further inquiries, once I find out what the school is willing to do.
Tell your DS that most of the time the kids need more help than he does so the teacher is actually kind hearted and cares about him. And then tell him it's OK to politely refuse, and teach him how. That was one of the first things my ds learned: When teacher offers him the answers, he can smirk and say, "no thank you." DS' friends find it amusing now as does DS though at first he was really put off.
I find his stories pretty amusing, too, and am noticing that he actually told me this (progress). I worry that he is non-receptive to the point of being surly and off-putting.
Thing is, DS really does need help with this--not to the level of showing him how paper fits in the notebook (ha ha) but in cueing him to do this.
He also seems to have no understanding of how to ask for and receive help. This happens in all environments.
He *really* has trouble when the class runs long, and time to pack up is rushed. Not sure if that is something that can be addressed by 504.
I really think he needs help in the context that causes the most trouble--school.
I received another feedback email, also positive, but it contained the phrase "he was good in class." Trying not to read too much into that, but the language bothers me. The hiring admin keeps hiring brand-new, first year teachers (the one referenced here is one)--which kind of drives me nuts, mostly because this program doesn't have a lot of oversight, so there is nobody to really mentor/monitor--and these kids are complicated!
I have already noticed two important things: the HS teachers are much more responsive and professional in their communication (and also have webpages with important documents and information). Also, the only "seasoned" MS teacher DS has (who has taught in the program for decades) was immediately responsive and professional.
