Seriously, at what point do you just cut bait? My friend (who has 2e daughter) talked to our other friend (who is SPED process coordinator who thinks I should just get him out of that school.
Our family has chosen to stay and change the environment. It has been a boatload of work. I do think DS was happy not to change schools.
We really looked for alternatives-- both elsewhere in district and in other local districts. We did not find schools that were clearly better in dealing with our particular profile, so we would likely have been starting over wherever we went. Once we started fixing, we just kept on because starting over in a new school would have been A LOT of work.
A 2E is going to be a problem fit in most places-- in most places you will have to figure out something unconventional. There is no fairy palace to move to, at least not of which I am aware.
I believe that most of the teachers in your situation are acting out of ignorance of disability, with a side dish of "we don't want unusual people in our program; they're too much work." This strikes me as a place where-- if the administration on some level is amenable--you could change the situation by educating people and incentivizing them to value each student. This pays off not just for your kid, but for all the kids. Again, it's work. It's what we did, and in our case it paid off.
In your shoes, I'd be looking at gifted options elsewhere while also trying really hard to solve the problems where DS is now. Know what all the options are. At some point, it will become clear which path is more straightforward and will yield the better fit.
