What Val said. Also-- what Ivy and Aquinas both said, too. We're living the consequences of not having achieved getting our DD into her proximal zone of development academically. It's been ugly, let me tell you. This is a child that has
never done "homework" or actually "studied" anything. Passively picking it up was enough-- even for AP coursework, and even at 12-14yo. Well, the sudden transformation in her life circumstances has been-- um-- unpleasant, to say the least. She also lacks emotional coping skills for something which has proven to be SUCH an insult to her self-concept. This is no joking matter.
I
know that we were (often) termed helicopter parents, and I'm equally certain that we were seen as relentless hot-housers, to boot. We weren't doing a cyberschool because we wanted to PUSH our kid faster, by any means. We were doing it so that we could (hopefully) keep things "even" enough for the next level-- and make sure that gaps didn't go unaddressed even if she COULD kinda compensate for them, mostly unnoticed by anyone but us. So if that is hothousing ("No, honey-- those are NOT what I call "notes" from that chapter. Please try again.")-- I'm guilty.
My standards were
always higher than the school's-- but I had my reasons, as noted above. I had a good idea what was coming in college. It was clear as day that the people running secondary these days DO NOT.
More generally:
There aren't even
colleges that are intended for
high potential and deep thinking anymore-- that's what we're seeing, anyway.
Sure, there are opportunities to get into a research track early-- if you are one of The Winner's Circle, that is. Meaning-- high achieving, even relative to the college cohort you're a member of.
I've noticed that my DD's college courses are not about
understanding anymore-- nope. They're about
VOLUME, baby... that way the strivers have a way of "working harder" their way to possible achievement right alongside the genuinely high LOG...
um-- well, no, actually, since that ISN'T, in point of fact how many people at high LOG manifest that high ability in the first place.
Oh, bother.
I guess that means that it ISN'T really suitable for "gifted" students after all. But we have put it in reach for those who are willing to sell their souls for a little more black market adderall. So it's all good.
My daughter cannot count on being able to do what we (and she) call "well" on exams merely by very thoroughly understanding, say.... philosophy. Nope. Now she has to spend a long time MEMORIZING 100 dates and terms verbatim in the hope of culling enough brownie points with memorization.
In other words, I'm
really, really glad that I listened to Jon at least enough to not tell her that "college will be Better! Different, you'll see!" because-- it isn't.College is the new high school. Only, new and improved, with additional performance and time pressure, and more complexity than any of us recalls as students.
Welcome to hell.
