This sounds difficult, and sounds like the more you push the harder they push back. And this has become an emotional issue -- so it doesn't sound like it will be easy to come to a level-headed decision for your daughter without taking a step back.
Easier said than done, I admit!
Talk to your daughter. What is the one thing she would change right now? Is she attached to enough other kids that moving to another school would hurt more than help?
Writing this stuff out (like you did above) can help tremedously. Talk to friends, hearing you explain your issues can help figure out if there are holes in your logic, expectations that are out of whack, etc.
I'd definitely start on some testing/assessment immediately if you have not already -- what assessment has already been done for your daughter? If it's possible to get something concrete to work with before making a move you will feel better.
Good luck!
edit: ps - the teacher might think she's covered her new discipline program by having that chat with you, and not feel like she needs to send a note to give further details.
Last edited by chris1234; 10/26/11 11:24 AM.
