My impression of your concerns with the schools is a tendency for them to only worry about behavior and totally ignore education. Some of them go as far as to ignore the giftedness as they feel the behavior is a sign of a lack of giftedness. I agree this is a big problem.
What I was referring to is the problem they also have getting the behavior in check so the teaching can be effective. Behavior is often just a sign of anxiety. That is why I mentioned removing the source of anxiety. It is pointless to try and educate an extremely anxious child.
Having read what else you said, I detect you feel keeping the child interested can solve the behavior problem. Yes, I would agree with this when the child is in a comfortable environment as in their home. In the school, the first problem they face is finding a comfortable environment for the child. Even the best teacher will have the odd occasion where a specific child is uncomfortable with them for no apparent reasons. What I was referring to is forget about the teaching until you at least solve any anxiety issues. This is both an upfront issue when the child begins school and a daily issue as the teacher learns the various trigger points in the child resulting in behavior issues. The teacher does not have the luxury of having years of experience with the specific child to work with. It is a learn as you go issue.
Giftedness and behavior are two separate issues and do have to be worked on. Academic education is not a cure for behavior. Sure keeping a child interested can avoid the behavior in the early years. So for a school, this is not a bad way to go as they can then focus on education. However a parent has to allow the behavior to happen in order to solve the behavior problems. A parent has to be the one setting the rules, not the child.
As much as ignoring the education entirely is a bad idea, ignoring the hehavior issues is at least an equally bad idea. Avoiding the situations resulting in the behavior is a good way to have productive periods of time during the day. It is still important to gradually introduce the situations resulting in the behavior. When the days come where this cannot be avoided, the results can be disasterous if not taken care of early.
I am just discussing my thoughts on this. In no way is this even close to an expert opinion. I am hoping getting in on the discussion will bring out some good ideas by others.
