Another update! I had a long chat today with a teacher who specialises in G-AS kids (Gifted-Asperger's). She too disagrees with the exclusionary, punitive approach and believes it's the wrong way to deal with Aspie and AD/HD children.
We also discussed the likelihood of my son receiving the intellectual challenges at home-- I said I can not imagine my son getting home from school and then me doing stuff with him to fully satisfy the intellectual needs. The poor child will already be exhausted and I doubt he'll want to do anything more than unwind and relax. Besides, I would *want* to help him relax and de-stress when he gets home.
I also didn't think the classroom was very Aspie-friendly, I felt a bit overwhelmed my all the visual distractions!
The specialist teacher agrees that the social side of things is such an important factor with my son... but there is a good chance he will not have the best experience there because a) the school uses an aversive approach to controlling behaviour; b) his sensory issues are pretty big and c) he will be underchallenged and therefore likely to be disruptive (and chances are he will be punished for that in a way that might provoke more undesireable behaviour).
On the plus side, this teacher said she wants to work with my son in a sort of mentor role. This is great news for us.
Still, there's a huge void where my son's social interactions are concerned. His weekly social skills group isn't going to be anywhere near enough. I have investigated local homeschooling groups to see if anyone else is in a similar situation so the children can get together but no such luck
