Have you googled your district name + due process? When I did that I saw that my district almost never goes there - I found only one case. (This confirms what DSS told our consultant early on. "[District] never goes to Due Process. We always reach agreements.") Others here have mentioned that they get a lot of results. You can look at the names of the attorney's who represented the families in the cases that you find. (Since you are an attorney you may know a better way to accomplish the search to find cases that have been filed and withdrawn without a formal finding. Probably will get more info that way...)

Last year I cut out communication with most people at DD's school and started doing everything through folks at central office. Superintendent, assistant superintendent, director of pupil personnel services, director of special service, etc are very busy people. It is amazing how much less cr** people give you when busy, decision maker types have to be involved in ridiculous minutia. If assistant superintendent agrees that substantive communication about IEP matters should go through her and principal I would tell her that you think everything will just go to her - she can involve or not involve the principal at her discretion. After all, he is too close and needs a break - right? She will either be able to reach reasonable agreements with you and DH or she will spend a lot of time going back and forth with principal and then back and forth with you. But hey - if the principal is blinded by anger and needs a break then who are you not to give it to him?

A couple of things my consultant said when he met with our superintendent the other day may be helpful to you here:

1) Sometimes the district loses the parents' trust and the situation becomes unworkable. In those cases it costs the district some serious money to place kids OOD. Your district may be heading down that road with you. A calm head here can save them A LOT of money later.

2) This is a last ditch effort to save both the parents and the district legal fees. Wouldn't you really rather spend that money on the child?

Good luck and keep us posted!