ColinsMum, you are right on so many points, and yes, we are expecting and teaching our son to be considerate, polite and to know when to stop talking. We are in no way encouraging him to say whatever he feels on a level he feels comfortable with - not at all. But every situation can be different. If your child's teacher is marking your child's test question wrong, but your child has it right, would you encourage your child to respectfully ask the teacher about it? I would. The teacher may or may not get defensive by a student bringing up a mistake they made. Most teachers wouldn't. Some do. The Mr. Zero teacher did
Of course, as parents, it is our job to raise considerate, polite and caring children. We need to teach them how to get along in society in order for them to be successful. I'm just frustrated with the extra burden that is on our gifted kids to continually try to fit in - into classrooms where instruction is moving too slow for them, in conversations with adults where they need to be careful to know their place as a child and not another adult, among peers where our gifted kids have trouble relating and are reminded to dumb it down a bit and in a world that does not seem to value them as much as we should.
The family philosophy at my house is the golden rule - just be nice! My personal version of that is to go out of my way to make everyone feel special. My gifted DS's version is that he IS being nice when he politely corrects someone. We tell him most people don't like to be corrected. His reasoning is, "Mom, is it nice to knowingly let these people go through their life embarrassing themselves because they are wrong?" He truly believes in his heart he is helping them...
Nobody said raising children was easy *sigh*
