Hi,
I've been watching this post with interest, since it seems to describe my relationship with my DS4 to a T. My DS4 was a terribly high needs baby who thoroughly crushed any vague notions we might have had about having more than one child, and I am a mother who does not especially like babies. I spent the first couple of years wishing I could fast forward to the part where we'd be able to have conversations, tell each other jokes and draw pictures together, and he'd occasionally go off on his own to read or play by himself for a while. We're finally getting there, and I am enjoying my son more than ever, but I have to say, he's only slightly less demanding at age 4 than he was as a baby. Instead of crying for me to hold him, my son now follows me around the house (so close I literally trip on him sometimes) whining "Mama, when are you going to PLAY with me" if I dare do anything as selfish as try to clean or make dinner. To make matters worse, as he gets older, the lack of siblings is becoming more of a problem. Even with nearly constant interaction at home (my husband and I basically take turns playing with him when we're not working), preschool 4 times a week, gym night and playdates in between, he tells us he's "lonely and bored." I get no exercise, have no real friends outside of email, and still (after 4 long years!) feel like I'm waiting for that day when I'll have more freedom (maybe once he reads chapter books??!). I still can't even figure out how people find time to post on this site as often as they do--DS4 is "waiting" for me right now.
Anyway, I'm realizing, my HG son is never going to "give" me more time or "let" me have more time, and that if I want time for myself, I'm going to have to "take" it. My mother always felt like she gave far more than she received while my siblings and I were growing up, and she was very bitter and resentful as a result, which wasn't good for anyone. I don't want to be like that.
He calls . . .
