Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums General Discussion What would you do differently?

I would stop optimistically hoping that teachers were experts ... I kept deferring to them on the basis that I assumed they had a clue about what to do with dd. I, like lucounu, would also be much more assertive in dealing with teachers and school administrators.

I would never try and down play dd's abilities when she was right beside me (fortunately realised I was doing this when was very small and stopped - I was trying I make other parents feel better then realised that wasn't my job!)

I'd be more honest with other parents - I have actually found most people are just curious about and ok with our choices when I am just open. In the beginning I'd start feeling like I had to justify myself and we'd all get a bit defensive. So now I just answer factually, if only when asked directly.

I'd embrace the loneliness of parenting an hg++ kid earlier - it's not going to change and I expended too much energy worrying about it. The flip side of that is I'd start seeking out other families with gifted kids earlier.

Like others have said, I'd parent the child I have earlier, rather than the one I thought she should be. I though gifted should look like one kind of kid (as do schools) - motivated, perhaps a little academically obsessive - when in fact they can look like, well, anything. Mine who at 6 has out of grade testing from school and psych showing she's across most of the 6th grade curriculum - has not the slightest academic motivation. She's a thinker rather than a doer. I spent waaaaayy too much time fretting about that meaning she wasn't gifted and that I was just making stuff up - despite having substantial other evidence that that was not the case.

I'd trust my gut more. It's always steered me right when I've taken the time to listen to it rather than rely on parenting books that just never seem to fit!