I think an issue that we are dancing around, is that College in general - as currently conceived of in the US, doesn't really appear to be a healthy environment for young people of age 16- 26.
I remember that when I was in college my 'outer-directed perfectionism' was highly active and I was very judgmental of the general behavior of my agemates. I was also judgmental of the Adults who said: "Aw, this is their only time in their life to cut loose and have fun, why be such a soil sport?" It seemed to me that the far too many young people suffered far too much, sometimes from the pressures of the academics, sometimes at their own hands and sometimes at the hands of their peers.
Although Spike Lee's 1988 film School Daze was written in a way that addressed some specific issues faced by students at historically black colleges, it really resonated with me overall and my experience at a very different university. Like the character at the end, I wanted to run around yelling: "Wake up...Wake up....Wake up!"
Humans are social creatures, so putting kids in large groups that have norms which are very different from the rest of society and very unhealthy, worries me as much at 18 as it does at 16. Of course I shouldn't have read:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/I_Am_Charlotte_Simmonsbut I can only hope that the novel is an exaggeration.
I don't have any answers, but I do want to raise this issue out of the background. I remember reading an article that talked about the deeply held belief in the US that college is the means to a good life. To qualify as a bubble, the deeply held belief has to be a irrational. Here's one
http://inflation.us/collegebubble.htmlI think that sending kids off for 5 years of partying is irresponsible. I think that kids who can think for themselves, and go to college to work hard and learn while continuing to mature into an adult who can create a lifestyle that includes basic self-care, should definitely go, if they have the wherewithal to realize what they are getting into. Personally, I think I had much more wherewithal to see the big picture at 15 than most of my 18 year old 'peers' had when I got to college at 17. I think being HG helped me have more of a big picture, but it wasn't my only quality that helped me steer a reasonable course.
I think living at home while going to college seems much more reasonable for most college-aged people. When I read the 'insider's guide' sorts of books that describe the various colleges and read that at a particular school it's normal for students to avoid Friday classes so that their alcohol binges can start on Thursday night, I think is very unfortunate.
Love and More Love,
Grinity
