Oh my. I'm sorry you upset her so much. I got into similar situation when DS6 was in K and I asked for better LA for him. Perhaps me saying that he could spell the words she kept giving him at the age of 2 wasn't the best way to say so but it was true. Ok, I might have skipped the part about the words being fine but for DS3 (he was at the same classroom) but not my older one
Honestly I couldn't understand how anybody could ask him to spell "cat" and "dog" after knowing him for 2 months and telling me how gt he was.
I pissed her off and she gave me a parenting lecture a few hours later when I came to pick him up. Something about perfectionism, whole child (I cannot here this phrase anymore), him learning only because of me, pushing him ... It was bad. Needless to say it didn't sit well with me either but I didn't argue. It was so ridiculous and off that I didn't even know what to say. It was the conversation which made us have him tested (he tested at 4th grade at spelling at that time). She ended up apologizing to me the next school day (Monday) but the damage had been done.
I took samples of his math work to school at one point and it helped some but math was taught by the other class teacher. Perhaps it will help in your case too. It's quite possible she might have never seen your son's scores and extremely likely she has no idea about his math abilities. In our care the scores helped a lot, at least in math.
Obviously I am no help with any diplomacy when it comes to schools. I just wanted to show that you are not the only one who upsets teachers.
Good luck
