Thanks to everyone who posted about this. Rest assured I have read your answers. The issue is so fraught and emotional right now that I don't know if I can even post about it. I feel like we are destroying our relationship with DD over this and I am about ready to let her tank whatever because I can't handle the tenor of our household and the damage it is doing to my sanity, my other child, and even my dog. She would be an incredible prosecuting attorney (I know you know the type), and the onslaught of her verbal rage amd mendacity on this issue is overwhelming to me. Of course, I don't think it would be particularly good parenting to let her twist in the wind, because 1) she must apply to high schools, as previously stated, and with her grades headed as they are, she would lose her shot at the prestigious one; 2) her EF skills are poor enough that I feel it is a cop-out. But since I literally cannot speak to her about this issue without her losing her mind with scorn and fury, even if I do so entirely neutrally, and since no loss of privilege appears to matter (she has lost them all at this point), I am at my wits' end. We have already been to counseling and were discharged due to her "progress." She had the counselor snowed. I feel concerned at times that she is gaslighting many adults in her life. She can seem incredibly mature and responsible and turn on a dime.
