Early on in our journey my advocate told me about another family he was working with who had just been turned down for *any* services despite their child's obvious need. These caring, committed, dedicated parents had spent thousands of dollars to get their child 15 hours a week of tutoring services. This meant that he *barely* passed by the skin of his teeth. It also meant the district denied their requests for services because he was passing. In other words their approach totally backfired. Thousands of dollars out of pocket, huge time commitment for the child and absolutely no better a result. It saved the district a bunch of resources with no better outcome for the child.
I very deliberately pulled all the private tutoring I was giving my DD in 1st grade when I realized the best thing for her was to get tested by the school and get an IEP. I noticed that I was propping her up and not showing school how bad things were. But this was at the end of 1st, beginning of 2nd grade and we had time. Once the testing was done, I had a better idea what to look for in outside help. Eco's kid is in junior high and I wouldn't pull all help for him at this grade and in this situation.
Yes looking around for another option might be best for Eco's son. Sadly not everyone has a lot of options because of either location or cost.
Reading this thread I'm trying to understand what accommodations you are expecting to get out of a IEP rather than a 504. I'm not sure you are going to get any better compliance with an IEP than a 504. My older DD with LD's had a IEP and my teen son has a 504. I was explained the difference as an IEP is written a student needs remediation. Last year when my son was already in H.S. and I wasn't asking the H.S. to provide any remediation an IEP wasn't necessary. One of the reasons I received a 504 with little struggle last year was that my son had in his record incidences back to 6th grade. It seems that the system really is set up to help children after they are already failing rather than to catch them before they fail.
