Originally Posted by Irena
Originally Posted by somewhereonearth
Originally Posted by nicoledad
While I agree with most everyone said above about the school I do have one question. Why is it a 7 year olds decision if he doesn't wants to go on a field trip?

Why should I pay for something that my son doesn't want to do?

Because it's about power! You must exert your power regardless of how meaningless! You must take choice and control away from your kid in any way possible! How else will he learn to blindly obey no matter what!?!? (in case it's not obvious, completely joking and being sarcastic here)

Personally, kids need a sense of control and of choice - I give it when I can (obviously within reason) I try not to take away control in a purposeless way because, really, the kid in such a situation will just tune out anyway. That is just my personal parenting philosophy and that's why my 7 year old (now 8) usually got a choice on field trips... it works really well for us. It seems especially important for my gifted kiddo.

And we have a winner! Irena you win the prize for guessing what the issue is. (And really, if I had a way to give you a prize, I would.) It is a big power/control trip. DH and I were at an event at school with other little ones in tow. Principal Cuddly Crocodile approached me because she was "very concerned" that DS7 is not going on the field trip. I thanked her for her thorough follow thru and her attention to this. But I simply repeated the reasons that DS has already told her about not wanting to go on the trip. I then asked her, what's all the kerfuffle about? Are they going to the Jim Jones Nature Center? (Blank stare.) She cited several reasons why children "must" go on field trips: wonderful educational opportunities, a child could miss out on thrilling and educational discussions regarding the trip in the days following, a child will miss out on irreplaceable social exchanges that can only occur on a long field trip bus ride. When I explained that he was ok with all of that and so were we, we got to the root of it: "If you refuse to go on the trip, other parents will think it's ok to do the same. We don't want you to set a precedent that will cause other parents to think that they can pick and choose the educational opportunities that the school offers. We are experienced professionals. We know what are great opportunities for children."

Then the principal approached DH (Mr. Terse - he doesn't use any more words than he ever has to use. He is linguistically efficient.) He just stated, "I find you and your staff to be offensive. I will not discuss the matter any further. Thank you." So, once DH and I were done playing good cop/bad cop we mingled with other families at this event (while our toddlers are bouncing around all over the place). Turns out this is business as usual for the principal and office staff regarding field trips.

Eh - I should have known. The control and not wanting to set a precedent is the same excuse we got for not accelerating and not homeschooling.

Last edited by somewhereonearth; 06/11/14 02:40 PM.