*I think my husband and I often get tricked by our son's use of language. I notice how often we talk to him as though he were a reasonable adult (when really he's a toddler with a thesaurus implant). I think this often leads us to expect more of him, behaviorally, than is realistic for his stage of development. I'm interested in changing this dynamic, but I don't know how.
Love the thesaurus implant idea! I struggle with this too.
I am an introvert and DS has been intense since he was born. Up until recently, DH really had no idea what I was talking about when I would say that I just needed a break. "How hard can just one child be?" was his attitude. But when DD (1 month) was born and DH started spending 6-7 hours a day with DS, he suddenly had a whole new appreciation for what I've been through the last three years. Even though he's an extrovert, DH said he's never felt so drained in his entire life.
DH often works 12 hour days, so I instituted a "meal times are quiet times" policy when it's just the two of us, which might seem backwards, but it works for us. He sits at a little table with his snack or meal (in the same room as me) and gets to watch something on his iPad or a video, and I get some desperately needed quiet time. He's also a very picky/resistant/selective eater, so being distracted while he eats helps him consume more, which for us is a plus.
Finding older, verbal, and energetic children for him to play with (neighbors and cousins) has been very helpful as well. I still have to supervise them since DS is also attracted to mischief, but it takes some of the burden for input off my shoulders and tires him out.
I don't have any books to recommend, but this forum has been a life-saver for me. Being able to read about other parent's experiences and to know that I'm not crazy is refreshing.
