I have become increasingly concerned over the past ten years or so by the entitlement mindset of so many young adults--there seems to be a sense that if they can come up with a rationalization for why they did or did not do something (e.g. fail to fulfill a responsibility; fail to meet criteria set by an employer or instructor), then the rationalization negates any actual problem or liability for the consequence. Is this because these young people were not taught to respect rules and expectations set by others? Is it because they were taught that if they didn't agree with a rule/expectation it could be discussed away? Or at least delayed by their right to negotiate or challenge it? Hard to say for sure, but it has definitely begun to inform the way I think about raising my own kiddos.
Perhaps I am not around young adults enough, but I have never noticed this sort of thing. I don't think any reasonable person will let someone get away with rule-breaking or shirking work just because they are able to come up with a rationalization about it. A reason is one thing; a rationalization is another. I think it is the authoritarian parent, not the authoritative parent, who is so inflexible as to be unwilling to consider a reasonable argument, made at a reasonable time and in a reasonable way.
We own a store that caters to teens/young adults and I have worked daycare for awhile. I see the entitlement mindset all the time. I even saw it when I was in college 10+ years ago. I have also seen many parents let children get away with murder because the kid has a good reason or because they don't want to "damage their relationship" with the child. Part of it is a materialism - throwing money at the problem mindset, but a lot of it has to do with kids being taught that it is ok to constantly question the adults in their lives. Some things are negotiable, some aren't. That's why there are courts and jails... It is not beyond reason to accustom children to hard and fast rules.
I have been known to tell my boys, "Because I say so" or "Because that's the way it is" and then explain the reasoning shortly afterwards. I don't see anything wrong with those phrases as long as they are reasonable requests that can be simply explained.
