I have never been able to figure out how to support this poor child in her emotional intensity, her intellectual intensity, or her competitive drive. I feel like she suffers for it and should have been born to parents who instinctively know how to nurture exceptional talent- like many of the parents on this board. I feel myself being jealous that y'all know exactly how to handle some things. Maybe if I were more supportive, I wouldn't have been locked out of the house so much, or been chastised by her pediatrician and preschool teacher for holding her back. (She would tell on me to them and they would advocate for her to me) Every day, I feel so challenged and unprepared for dd, and every day she adds new dimension. It is surely never dull, but it's more her guiding me on what to do with her than me providing that "father know's best" anticipitory guidance for growing up.
So sorry you are going through all this. I have to say that most parents don't know what they are doing. Yes, some know more than others how to handle things...but good parents will try to learn and try to change things when they aren't working. It sounds like you are doing exactly that. I teach parenting classes, I have researched working with and parenting gifted children, I have looked here for support...And I STILL don't think I have everything quite right yet. No one is the perfect parent. It's normal to look back and see what we could do different. Hindsight is 20/20, what matters now is to look ahead and do all you can. It's not like it's too late, they are still young. I learn more every day.
Sometimes I kick myself for not going with my initial instincts (like my ridiculous idea that DS4 didn't need a pre-k with academics since he was so far above pre-k academics...I felt I should just put him in a play-based pre-k. That was an awful experience and they kicked him out after a month. That had to be very hard and confusing for him and if I hadn't done that and gone straight to the Montessori things would have been better. BUT, he survived and I survived and although it seemed like the worse thing ever at the time...he doesn't seem scarred from the event and is thriving in his new program. Parenting is all about making mistakes and hopefully learning from them. Please don't feel like people on here are more qualified to parent your child. You are the parent you are looking for resources and help...that already puts you above so many parents that think they have all the answers and don't.
