I still disagree and think that if things are being said ABOUT my child that she shouldn't hear-- maybe the adults saying them ought to be keeping those things to themselves. Be aware that they don't/won't, and they'll blame you for the hurt they cause. If it happens to be a classroom teacher... be aware that you're asking your child to be compliant with a person who that child KNOWS is untrustworthy and doesn't care about him/her. Few HG+ children are going to take that well.
Finally-- consider that last point in a child with high social/emotional/empathetic skills. Even if they ARE NOT privy to details, if a classroom teacher reveals that kind of hostility, I'd consider that a do-not-pass-go kind of moment. No way do I believe that my child can remain ignorant about that adult's attitude toward her; I certainly don't need to tell her for her to figure it out.
This is such TRUTH!! The roots of my son's anxiety disorder began with being exposed to this type of thing at 5 in a school that had been a safe and happy place for him. (It's a long story but the person who caused the harm was posing as a mental health professional, was unlicensed and eventually fired only after causing damage to many children who had the misfortune of crossing his/her path.)
He shut down for nearly a year and only recently told me how he had "marked his shoe with blood as a reminder that this was not a safe place". He does not trust being in new places or with new people without me. He logically believes that if his happy school could turn so bad in an instant that he can't trust anywhere/anyone to be reliable. We have so much work to do to recover from this. Getting a hostile disability punishing teacher in his new school did us no favors in that regard. I'm not sure he can ever be the person he was before being put under the control of these 2 individuals.
