I am sorry if I discouraged you with our mention of leaving the school DS was enrolled in last year. Although they offered us the chance to leave very early in the school year, we decided to stick it out. stupidly believing we could just coach him to behave better in class (this was a private school, we would have had to eat part of the tuition even if he left). That particular school, though, was less hostile than it was just woefully uninterested in meeting his needs.
We left because we had an attractive alternative (one we were unaware of a year ago). Since that is not a good option in your case, all the suggestions about dealing with an unfriendly response are very good ones. We did find last year that documenting meetings (a habit from work, I always have a notepad), being prepared with research and being willing to call them out if they were being jerks helped. There was one comment the principal made in a meeting that was extremely rude toward DS, which was also unfactual. When I told DH about it, he went ballastic, which raised my ire as well.
I kept calling the principal until she picked up the phone and very matter-of-factly told her that we thought she had been rude and wrong with her statement. Then I stopped talking. She fell all over herself apologizing. This technique may be worth a try. Very polite bluntness followed by silence. People HATE silence. It is amazing what comes out of mouths when their brains want something to fill the quiet.
