I don't know. But I *do* want to thank you for sharing your experiences with your daughter here. While she is way more gifted than I was or than my dd is, I totally identify (on a smaller scale) and really believe that if I had a parent advocating for me the way you are it would have made a significant difference.
And this is a hard concept for my dd too. Sometimes she is paralzyed by perfectionism. Sometimes she does a half-assed job and seems totally content with it, (which for some things is OK...but sometimes I feel like, "really? that is your best work?")
But then in her conference yesterday (she skipped 6th, first teacher conference for 7th) with straight As in advanced classes, this is her self report:
3 things you are happy with so far this year:
1. I had all As at the end of the 9 weeks
2. I have done fairly well in my work
3. I have enjoyed learning the majority of the things I've learned.
3 things you think you need to improve
1. keeping all of my grades as As for throughout the next 9 weeks
2. Some of my test grades
3. Some of my grades on work
I just didn't have a good feeling about this. We have tried to emphasize that it isn't the grade that matters but that she tries her best and is learning...but this makes me think she isn't getting it!
So, not very helpful to your situation. I wish you could get through to the guy. Interested to hear other suggestions.