Hi Cricket,
I don't have any great advice to add. As you know, we are in the exact same boat with DD9.5. She has great accomodations, for the most part, but we are often left wondering if we are doing the best we can. I have pretty much given up trying to tease the ADD issues from the dyslexia/dysgraphia issues. Everything is emeshed deeply in the fiber of 'her'. I'm not sure what each individual accomodation addresses, but I do know that on a whole they are helping... thank goodness because it took us three years of trying to achieve moderate success!
Before DD's dyslexia diagnosis was 'removed' (she has stealth dyslexia), we had her on a waiting list for Orton-Gillingham tutoring. They organization that ran the program checked in regularly and advocated strongly for us to continue to foster a love of the written word. If your daughter does not already have an IEP or accomodations about reading, this may be a place to start. She absolutely should have access to audio books. We were advised to give unlimited access and to offer to read to her each night.
RE: her dislike of reading, my husband is undiagnosed ADD (would stake my coffeemaker on it) and he has not read an entire book in the 14 years I have known him. He wants to do it, and often starts books, but his inability to pay attention prevents him from a)getting anything out of the book, b)enjoying what he is reading (he engages in verbal battle with himself to keep reading rather than paying attention to what the words mean, and he has to reread passages multiple times), c)finishing the story. In his case, the reading difficulties are completely ADD-related. It is very likely that your daughter is battling both the ADD and dyslexia with her reading difficulties making it a more complex picture and harder to get the accomodations just right.
As I have said before, I wish you were someone I knew IRL. Your daughter and your family struggle with the same dilemmas we face daily. Best of luck sorting it all out.... and if you ever do, can you tell me what works???
