My DS8 was just recently diagnosed with ADHD combined. I wish I would have discovered the NHA and Transforming the Difficult Child Workbook years ago. But, I never really thought my kid was that difficult (although he has been called defiant by a few teachers) - just demanding, spirited and exuberant. Consequences (ie taking something away) has never worked for my DS8 - traditional timeouts were not effective either (the NHA approach time outs are more effective, but hard to implement -that is why I wish I would have started with it earlier.
Positive reinforcement is the key for my DS. Negative reinformcement just results in a power struggle that usually ends badly (I still slip up sometimes though). Right now, we allot screen time only if he has accumulated points toward minutes of time. He gets points for good behavior, helping out, doing extra chores or doing them the first time I ask, taking no for an answer, saying things like I really don't want to take a shower, mom, but I know that is what you want me to do, so I am going to do it without arguing. When he asks to watch TV, play video computer games or surf the web, he can only do so if he has screen time (only other rule is after homework). Sometimes if he has used his time, he will say, I don't have any screen time, what good behavior can I demonstrate to get some.
