I've noticed this with dd5, the feeling that she doesn't want to apologize because it will mean she really did something wrong, there is something wrong with her, she is a bad person, etc..(from what I can gather).. If I have my wits about me when something like this happens, I control my tone, expression etc., to make it sound like we 'are all reasonable people here, nothing HORRIBLE has happened!', bit of a smile, '**But** you do need to know that is wrong, and to please apologize so we can all keep playing/shopping, etc.'.
It is hard for me, she drives me kind of crazy and I tend to overreact, but that is usually the quickest path to her digging in her heals. Sigh. I am learning, slowly.
