Okay, here's what my experience has shown me:
Dd (13yo) has a certain amount of coping skills/resources to expend throughout the day when it comes to tasks like remembering homework, not ending up in the shower for forty-five minutes, whatever...attention stuff. She can, sufficiently motivated (and yes, I hold electronics hostage too), hold it together enough to do these things unmedicated. It comes at a cost, though-- eventually she runs out of mental energy and turns into a complete flitterhead, and a cranky one at that.
She, unfortunately, has had adverse reactions to the ADHD meds we've tried so far. We're giving it one more go and if the last one doesn't work, she's just going to have to go through life unmedicated. To that end we're working hard on coping skills and strategies to get her through the end of middle school and through high school and college. I'm hoping it works, but it's too early to tell yet. I hope so, because I don't have real high hopes for the med, and I don't want her living in my basement when she's forty.
Wow, I never put it together about the 45 minute showers being an ADHD thing! My DD has used a kitchen timer when taking showers, that worked really well for her (and us).
Eldertree, I think a life without meds may not be so bad...After reading that the brain keeps developing til age 26 (particularly the part that involves executive function - planning, organization, time management etc), I am very hopeful that with a little bit of understanding, some diet modifications and some support with coping strategies through college, most of these issues will resolve themselves as the EFs develop. We may end up trying the meds as a last resort but I am really hoping to avoid it.
We don't even have a basement so that's not an option for DD lol!!! Actually, when I was a teen, my mom told me not to stress or worry, that I could just live in a trailer on her property if I couldn't find my way in the world. The fear of that scenario kicked my b*t into high gear!!!!
