I do think that kids that struggle will adopt an "I don't care" persona to cover up for their distress. I truly believe that almost every child wants to be successful - and when they start to detach themselves, there is a reason.
Yes, that is my feeling too. I am trying to figure out where his "I don't care" is coming from.
The fact that he was able to do very well on a couple of tests once he had the external motivation of extra computer time made me start to wonder if the "I don't care" was coming from somewhere else than struggling with attention issues.
Part of it might be the switch from Montessori, where he had no tests and no grades. Their philosophy is that the learning is important, not the grade on an exam. DS actually said this to me almost word for word recently when I pointed out that he knew 100% of the math on the test, but lost many points for not "showing his work" and writing complete answers. He doesn't seem particulary happy to bring home an A paper (except if it means more computer time!), and is also not really dissapointed if he brings home a C. I have to say almost the only time I have seen him actually proud of an achievement was when he won a prize in a short story contest put on by the public library last year.
Two other reasons I can think of for the "I don't care" attitude from conversations I have had with him are: (1) boredom and (2) thinking that is is not "cool" to want to do well at school.
I have been trying to help him understand that working hard now will allow him to go to a good school with interesting classes later, and hopefully get a job that he enjoys after that. Is he too young for this kind of talk? He doesn't seem to be able to relate to this line of discussion at all. I don't know how to convince him that good work habits and doing well in school are important.
