Wow, thank you all for you responses. There are so many things I want to respond to on here (I haven't commented in a few days)...Let's see...I'm going to reply in list form so as to make it more logical for those reading this
1-) let me give a nutshell background on my DH. Probably should have done this sooner. He is HG (maybe even PG) and when he was in school the teacher's perceived him as having a learning disability b/c of his hyperactivity and refusal do do the mediocre work they assigned him. The school decided to fail him one year, and the next year they attempted "fail" him again mid-year by placing him in a lower grade. After 2 days, that teacher took him back to his original class and stated "There is nothing wrong with this boy. He is extremely smart and does NOT belong in my class. You just need to challenge him more." Well nothing came of her comment and his mother (obviously my MIL that I spoke of in the original post) did not stand up for him and instead attempted to handle the situation by chastising him continuously for not "applying himself". He spent the rest of his school years skipping class, making D's and F's, and sleeping during class. Finally, at 17 and in 9th grade, he dropped out and got his GED. He placed 1st in the class and 4th in the state on his GED test despite never attending class.
I do not want this to happen to our DD5! which is why I am so desperate to find her the resources she needs.
2-) If she has a problem, she always comes to mom first b/c she shows mom is the understanding one and will listen to her. Dad is more of the blunt straight-to-the point one. So therefore, she comes to me with her concerns and I then have to relay them second-hand to her dad. Therefore he doesn't get the emotion and urgency behind her unhappiness at school.
3-) I've told him many times about homeschooling groups and meetups. I have even provided him with countless pieces of information on the learning needs of GT students. If I bring up the topic he is on board with me
so long as he has not had any "contact" with his mother within the last 24 hours. If he has spoken to her recently, he will be very resistant and combative when I bring up the subject of HSing or GTness. So there's definitely something there. I should probably mention that my MIL is a very brash narcissistic woman.
4-) Katelyn'sM om: I love your post. My DH has the same feelings on socialization as you. He always points to adults he knows that were HSed and says "see, xyz is a shy hermit with absolutely zero social skills. Have you ever even heard them speak? Do you want our kid to turn out like that?" as ammo for his socialization issue. He also uses The Dugger's (have you heard of the family with 16+ kids from arkansas?) as ammo that "all HSers are raised by religious nutcases". Oh, if I had a dime for every time I heard these...
5-) Lori H.: I so agree with you as well! I have often commented that the only things DD5 has learned in K is how to
a-) eat her snack before her sandwich (which she never did before),
b-) count by pointing to each individual dot and saying "1,2,3,etc as she touches each one (she used to be able to sight count. you know look at a collection of dots and immediately state the number)
c-) not ask questions and instead sit quietly and listen
d-) not sit too close to the other students b/c if one of them speaks, she will get in trouble as though she was the one who talked
e-) not to interact with the other kids b/c if she uses leadership skills she is being "bossy" and thus will get a conduct mark.
f-) etc, etc, etc.
6-) I called the board of education the other day and requested info and paperwork on homeschooling. When I told DD5 that I should be receiving the info in the mail soon and I was going to read over the paperwork and make my decision, there was an instantaneous 180 of her demeanor! That day she brought me home 2 100's on her tests and a perfect conduct mark. She became happy and chipper again. Her eyes now appear bright as opposed to cloudy and distant. Someone "turned on the light switch" as well, b/c she has started asking the well-above-her-years questions and eating better again. I just wish my DH would make the connection between her change in demeanor and what I said.
The papers haven't arrived yet, but by simply mentioning it, I got my child back. That alone seems to be the fact that has tipped the scales for me. This is something I have to do. Warrior mom is here!
Thanks quys!
Oh, and one last thing. When we lived in Memphis, her pediatricians knew/suspected she was GT and would talk to me about it. When she had her school physical with a Dr. she had never met, he even asked me if she was GT. I said I think so. We have since moved to a really small town (my DH's hometown in Nwest TN) to escape the crime of the big city. There is NO Pediatrician here only family doctors. There is NO psychologist for GT's. There are NO GT teachers (although the school does have special education teacher that teaches a pull-out program for the advanced students starting with 3rd grade). So if anyone knows of anyone in Nashville, Memphis, Jackson, or within driving distance of any of these places please, please let me know. Right now it looks like I am on my own. Would contacting her old pediatrician for advice get me anywhere? Thanks again!
