Does anyone manage to work full-time while raising one of these children?
The time-consuming nature of advocacy can definitely impact family lifestyle and priorities. Some may say the only thing worse than spending time documenting, is spending MORE time because you did
not document... things can pile up quickly.
Documenting can encourage one to boil down each encounter into salient facts. For example, in a post upthread it was mentioned that the 504 is not being followed. You may wish to keep documentation on what is
not being done that should be, as well as what
is being done which should not be.
Only slightly different from other advice given, it is often possible to keep
all sides of the encounters "sane" by focusing (and re-focusing) on facts, stating (and re-stating) your common and unifying objective (which is to facilitate access to appropriate educational experiences for your child), staying calm and unemotional, seeking information, not presuming certain underlying motives but rather asking for clarification, and realizing when something seems to push your buttons and feels internally like it may trigger a negative emotional response... do not yield to that impulse but rather make a note of it. During an encounter (such as a meeting or phone call) or from one encounter to the next, you may find that you are repeating yourself but that is OK.
You mentioned upthread that your father is an attorney. Might he be interested to review the information on the wrightslaw website, and see how it may apply to your advocacy efforts?
This might also help increase understanding within the extended family, as to what you are dealing with, and build support within the extended family as a safe place to talk about circumstances and to vent. 
