KnittingMama, pinip's very interesting points brought something to mind. You said that DS had similar issues in 1st and you pulled him out to homeschool. You also said that you told DD that 1st would be better. Maybe she's angry with you as well. Could it be that she sees you as having misled her about 1st being better? Is she angry that DS got to escape and she doesn't? Please understand I'm not trying to judge you or say that you really meant any of that, but might that be her perspective?