She has friends and school insist she is doing fine socially. But I am increasingly convinced that she's doing fine in superficial / shallow situations and is lagging in complex preteen girl social awareness.
She's been very thoroughly schooled by us, and her schools, on appropriate behavior and has learned this mostly very well, but increasingly it's clear that there are subtleties that she doesn't get. There are behaviors and small incidents everyday where we correct her (and she often seems puzzled), but her 5 yr old sister would not need to be told.
Girls with AS are extremely hard to identify because they try SO hard socially, but don't quite get it. They usually don't have the profile of meltdowns and other assertive behaviors that boys with AS often have that make it obvious that something is up. They can sometimes seem a little like they're drifting; afraid to say the wrong thing, following along but not in the mix somehow.
Are you seeking evaluation? You'll need a practitioner (neuropsych or developmental pediatrician) who specializes in autism and has seen lots of girls.
A useful item I forgot to mention: the website and parent forum at MAAP / OASIS:
http://www.aspergersyndrome.org/ . It has a list of resources by state.
DeeDee
