You know what I think of as I read this? Not the whole "free range" vs. Helicopter" (which annoys me to no end, btw) or any of that. I just strikes me as something very simple... The WASP tendency to be indirect about EVERYTHING and never really say anything too strong. I am from inner-city working-class (which I in no way idealize, mind you, and looking back I'd choose to be raised in the upper-middle class WASP culture I am about to criticize somewhat anyday!) and I now live in WASP world - where I have found it very striking that my in-laws and my neighbors never say anything directly... everything is passive-aggressive. Example - book club with my neighbors, one other woman there is also from inner-city, working-poor background, the rest all upper-middle class WASPS. Fellow inner-city woman announces that she "hated the book we read that month" about which we had gathered to discuss. This did not concern me at all. It is after all a book club. The others talked about this for weeks, maybe months after... they were absolutely shocked and appalled that 'she would say such strong direct words with no regard for the others in the club who liked it or the person who chose it!' They found it very offensive and there was much discussion for how she could have phrased her opinion in a more palatable manner. I was quite perplexed. This is one example of several such experiences I have encountered in the socioeconomic class not of my origin. And that particular woman? Not much liked at all for her directness... She is constantly misinterpreted and gossiped about routinely due to her direct nature.
I think it is just this type of culture taking over.
On the other hand, in my college days it was a horrible comedian was all over with these awful misogynistic jokes (I forget his name ... it will come to me) and two live crew, and other such things I had to deal with on a daily basis so I am not sure a more PC culture is bad...
And I wonder if people are not conflating the two unnecessarily? Be PC and respectful but also be able to discuss unpleasant things and express opinions strongly and directly.. must the two be mutually-exclusive? I don't think so. I feel like I am able to do both relatively well ... most of the time (with the exception of here just now where I in a very un-pc manner called people WASPs and then stereotyped them!)
I am upper middle WASP and I'd say this is more likely to be regional than class based. Are you in the south? Everyone I met in the south was like this, it drove me crazy!!!
No, I am in the northeast! I lived in the south (Louisiana) for about three years, though, and noticed it was worse there definitely! I think I notice it so much because I really went from one extreme to the other and have to go back and forth between the two. When I bring my suburban mannerisms to my working poor family, they are very annoyed and distrustful of me and when I bring my working-poor catholic me to my WASP family (in-laws, for example) they are shocked/offended. I'll be the first to admit, I seem to have trouble being completely one with one group and the other way with the other group. Sometimes, I forget where I am LOL... I'm sure there are many other factors at play - sexism, mental health issues, etc . I am not sure it is something one would readily notice unless you really are traveling deeply between and communicating in both groups. I do like the WASP world better ... it is 'nice'
albeit annoying, fake and stifling at times.... I love my inlaws as batty as they drive sometimes with all of their "niceness." But I am a bit of an outsider still with the women in my particular neighborhood and that's fine.
