I am joining this thread late, but Massachusetts has a number of public school systems that I consider to be as good or better than all but a few of the nation's best private schools. And I'm talking about schools available to anyone in the town, not exam schools like Boston Latin.
Our school system does not encourage grade acceleration, nor is there really separate classes for gifted kids. Yet my son's grade has has 3 of top 100 math students in the country, and recent high school grads have included an IMO gold medalist and Davidson Scholarship award winner. The average SAT score is above the 90th percentile.
And there is another public school system in Massachusetts that is arguably even better. These schools are admittedly rare, and the towns are somewhat expensive to live in. But given the cost of private school tuition, they are an absolute bargain. I am sure there are similar schools in many other states as well.
I disagree. Somewhat expensive = $300,000 to $500,000 premium on housing. Even the super expensive $40,000 a year schools are less than that, and I've heard they give generous aid to even wealthy families.
But, even that's assuming that these prestigious districts are appropriate for gifted kids rather than highly pressured hothouse kids, which is (from what I've heard) debatable. Several people have told me that a mediocre district is more flexible for kids beyond the norm.
I disagree with your math. Spending $40K per year on tuition is money gone forever. On the other hand, spending $40K per year on a 30-year mortgage @ 4% will allow you to buy a $700K property. Let's call it a $600K property to leave money for property taxes. Depending on the town and location, you can get a home with 1800-2500+ sq ft are available for that much money. That also gives you a place to live, equity over time, and possible asset appreciation. Or you could rent instead and get an even nicer place. The costs of public and private schools are not even remotely comparable.
Also, it matters little even if most of these "prestiguous" districts are hot-houses (which as you say, is debatable). All that matters is if the one you choose for your child is nurturing for gifted kids. We have found that to be the case in ours, and I hear the same is true in the town that is arguably better, as we know a lot of families with gifted children from both towns.
2500 sf for $600,000 in Lexington, Concord, Newton, Wellesly et al? Impossible. I'd be interested to see if a second toilet could be got for that.
OK, so excluding foreclosures and including every house under $600,000 (bidding wars! They'll sell for another $50,000+), there is a home selling for $599,900 in Lexington. The only one under $600,000, and it's 3/1, 1300sf. Concord's more reasonable, there are a couple at only $450,000-$500,000, big condos, 1400sf, one with three bedrooms. Wellesley has a house with 3/1, 1400sf, and some condos. See what I mean? And rentals are way worse. These would be a $3000 mortgage and rent for more than that per month.
For $160,000 (4yrs at $40,000), plus not paying closing costs on selling the $600,000 house when they graduate (5% is $30,000), plus not paying interest on that amount (which is also dead money), I know which decision would be wisest. And that's not including the possibility that that supposedly awesome district is really very awful, which is a situation a lot of my friends have been in. And then you're stuck with the enormous mortgage/closing costs and private school fees.
