I have been wondering about this a lot lately. I consider myself bright but have always felt bad because when tested at an early age (7?) I scored too low to be included in the gifted pull-out activities at my public school. My school recommended testing because I scored in the 99th percentile in all categories on the state achievement tests. My parents reluctantly agreed because they always made fun of parents who felt their kids were gifted. I grew up in a poor, working class family in a community where there were very few college educated people. My parents had high school educations and had come from really rough backgrounds. My mother barely spoke English (but didn't try speaking to me in her native language). My parents loved me but they were abusive. They never read books to me. We didn't have money for many toys and I mostly played outside or watched television. When I asked questions my parents usually either answered, "because" or "stop asking so many questions." I never attended preschool and was an only child so I didn't spend much time with other children before kindergarten. My mom stayed at home but she didn't really believe in playing with me or reading to me.
When I entered school, I quickly learned to read and became an obsessive reader. I remain one today. In elementary school I read through entire sections of the library- every single book. The librarians changed their lending policies so I could be furnished with adequate books. I really feel like books saved my life. I continued to be at the top of my class and to score in the 99th percentile on achievement tests through graduation but was never again tested for giftedness. I ended up leaving my small town to attend college in New York and later attended law school. I was the first person in my entire family (in this country) to get a college degree and have accomplished a lot considering my background but I have always felt not quite smart enough because of that one IQ test. I have no idea how I scored- my mom said the psychologist said I was bright but not quite gifted. She has no idea what my score was.
When a psychologist recommended testing our son last year, I hesitated because of my own experience. I finally agreed because we were applying to a school that required an IQ test. Our son is gifted and his younger sibling is maybe even more gifted (but not tested yet). I often attribute their brilliance to my husband, who is HG. In the last year I've done a lot of reading about gifted traits, however, and it has made me wonder. I have so many of the traits and so much of what I read has helped me to make some sense of my childhood . I wonder if I was a late bloomer or if my background in some way affected my score, even though it shouldn't? I read about how tests can vary and wonder if I just had a bad day. Or I wonder if being in school helped me to grow smarter after a terrible beginning. Or maybe I'm just one of those people who are bright enough to succeed but not gifted and I happen to have two gifted sons. It really doesn't matter because I don't care what my IQ is but reading about giftedness in order to understand my sons better has made me think about this issue again and it matters only because it may be a fine opportunity for me to put lingering feelings of inadequacy to bed.
I should add that we now live in a house overflowing with books and toys. I spend hours every day reading to my kids and doing science experiments and art and hiking with them. It feels so good to give them the experiences I missed as a child!
