Just so you know, it does get better. Differences at the younger ages are very obvious - and the whole reading/ not reading, writing/not writing/writing in cursive thing really can make some kids look very different. Once they get to first or second grade, I found - this is much easier. Everyone is reading, everyone is writing and everyone is doing math. That said, I also don't answer questions about dd's abilities. If someone talks about thier own kid- that is where I keep the focus, give lots of compliments about how great their child is doing. I save my comments about my own child for the grandparents and for this forum.